Marrying An Ex-Christian Woman Who Has Become Muslim
Recently And Has A Child
Islamic Rulings -
Living Shariah Verdicts
Islamic Questions & Answers
I have a very good friend who embraced Islam
only a couple of months ago.
She was married and had a child with her Christian
husband. The marriage is now annulled after her
conversion and she has the custody of the child.
I want to marry her and support her child but my
parents are not allowing me to do so. I am proud to
say that I was God's tool for the conversion of this
But now I face this tough situation. On one hand my
parents seriously resisting my wish and are not ready
to allow me to marry this girl because she comes from
a different culture and society and also has a son
from her previous marriage.
And on the other hand I know that this girl needs a
lot of help with her life and religion and I want to
help her by marrying her and taking her child as my
Please advise me in the light of Qura'an and Sunnah,
whether I should go ahead with my choice and judgement
or should I leave her alone according to my parents'
will even after knowing that the only reason they are
rejecting her is because she comes from a different
country and culture?.
Praise be to Allaah.
Parents have important rights over their children,
hence Allaah mentioned the command to honour parents
in conjunction with the command to worship Him Alone,
as He says:
“And (remember) when We took a covenant from the
Children of Israel, (saying): Worship none but Allaah
(Alone) and be dutiful and good to parents”
“Worship Allaah and join none with Him (in worship);
and do good to parents…”
“Say (O Muhammad): Come, I will recite what your Lord
has prohibited you from: Join not anything in worship
with Him; be good and dutiful to your parents…”
“And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but
Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents. If one
of them or both of them attain old age in your life,
say not to them a word of disrespect, nor shout at
them but address them in terms of honour”
Honouring parents, treating them kindly and striving
to please them are among the greatest of good deeds
and best of characteristics.
It is known that a man does not have to marry a
particular woman, so if there is a conflict between
pleasing his parents and marrying a woman he wants,
then he should undoubtedly give precedence to pleasing
Al-Tirmidhi (1900) and Ibn Maajah (2089) narrated from
Abu’l-Darda’ that a man came to him and said, “I have
a wife and my mother is telling me to divorce her.”
Abu’l-Darda’ said: “I heard the Messenger of Allaah
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say, ‘The
father is the best door to Paradise.’ So if you want,
you may ignore this door or pay attention to it.” This
hadeeth was classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh
What Abu’l-Darda’ said has to do with divorce, which
is more serious than the issue at hand, because
divorce is a very serious matter. Hence the correct
view is that you do not have to obey your parents in
this matter. (See al-Adab al-Shar’iyyah by Ibn Muflih,
Based on the above, you should try to convince your
parents to let you marry this woman. If they insist on
refusing then our advice is to obey them. The woman
will find a righteous husband to marry in sha Allah,
and you will have the reward of having brought her to
Islam, praise be to Allaah.
And Allaah knows best.