It Doesn't Cost Anything To Be Civil
13 January 2017
By Khaled Almaeena
I have written several times both in English and Arabic about the lack of
civility in our approach to daily life.
The list of complaints can go on and on. What makes me return to this subject
is an incident that I observed yesterday in which a driver parked his car
right in the middle of the road. Workmen from a company repairing the road
requested him to park it 10 meters away. Their request was met with a series
of unnecessary expletives. The workmen could only shake their heads in
disbelief.
This reminded me of many similar incidents that I have witnessed over the
years. I also used to receive letters at the newspaper complaining about the
treatment meted out to workers by the companies that employed them. ''Is it
because we are expatriates?'' enquired one writer.
My answer to him was no. Rudeness and insulting behavior are rarely selective.
It's a question of how you were brought up and the environment you live in. It
does not have anything to do with position or power nor with religiosity. It
stems from within.
It comes from ingrained empathy and caring for others and the desire to treat
them in the same way that you would want to be treated.
I am not so naïve as to believe that we can erase this negative behavior from
our society. Modern day pressures have caused many people stress that
translates into a bad attitude and a cynical view of others. And, of course,
it is easy to target those who are lesser privileged than us be they Saudis or
expatriates.
However, we should not confront these people by shouting or arguing, but
through reason and logic and a smile. In some cases, it may not work, but it
might prevent a fallout which could lead to a fist fight and a broken nose!
A Saudia ticket counter agent once told me how a customer went on a rampage
screaming at him and telling him, ''I work for so and so; I can have you
transferred you from here in a second!''
The agent said that if he had not been an employee, he would have given the
man a bloody nose as his insults became personal. ''But,'' he said, ''I kept
my cool and calmed him down knowing that what he wanted was against the
regulations.''
It's good that he maintained his cool. We will never know what may have
occurred if he had answered back. I would, therefore, advise against
confronting these rude people who do not know how to be civil.
Just walk away. It's not worth it …
— The writer is Editor-at-Large. He can be reached at kalmaeena@saudigazette.com.sa
and followed on Twitter: @KhaledAlmaeena
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