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Ruling On A Woman Letting A Man Know That She Wants To Marry Him

Islamic Rulings - Living Shariah Verdicts

Islamic Questions & Answers

Islamically , Is it okay for a sister to let a brother (in islam) know that she cherishes him and she has the intention to get married to him? Is it considered to be bold approach?

Praise be to Allaah.

There is nothing wrong with a woman letting a man know that in principle, however the woman should not propose herself, rather it is better if that is done via her wali (guardian) or someone else who can let the man know. This is indicated by the fact that 'Umar (may Allaah be pleased with him) offered his daughter Hafsah in marriage to Abu Bakr and 'Uthmaan (may Allaah be pleased with them).

Shaykh Dr. Khaalid al-Mushayqih

Should I Marry Him? Our Degree Of Knowledge About Islam Is Very Different

I have a problem as regard marriage. I am engaged to my cousin. we are both muslims, but out degree of knowledge about islam is very different. Infact i wear the hijab and try to be a good muslim while on the other hand he tries to be a good muslim but i get the impression that he is not trying hard. He is a very nice and sweet person, but sometimes i am scarred that he would not be up to standard as regard islamic practices.. for example on the weekend he goes clubbing with his friends. I am scarred and confused!! Should i marry him? we decided to get married in 5 years time, so is there time to charge him? He is always accusing me of trying to change him, but i want him to change for the better. What should i do?

Praise be to Allaah.

We share your fears concerning marriage to this man, and we urge you to agree to marry a man who is religiously committed and of good character if one comes and proposes to you, because the Prophet (Peace And Blessings Of Allaah Be Upon Him) said: "If there comes to you one with whose religious commitment and character you are pleased, then marry (your female relative under your care) to him, for if you do not do that there will be tribulation in the land and great mischief."

The decision mentioned in the question to get married after five years is strange, but so long as your relative has chosen this lengthy period, you have plenty of time to find someone else who is more suitable, if such a one should come and propose so long as there is no marriage contract (nikaah) between you and your relative. If no one who is more suitable comes along during this time, it is permissible for you to marry him (your relative), so long as He is a Muslim and he is not doing anything that would put him beyond the pale of Islam. We ask Allaah to give you strength.

Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid



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