Honey
vs. Vinegar: Survivor Afghanistan, Episode 2
22 February 2010By Jane Stillwater
My friend the "Marine Mom" just shot me another
e-mail. "If you are determined to write about the game
of Survivor," she wrote, "why don't you write about
'Survivor Afghanistan'? I have a son over there now,
serving in Helmand Province with the Marines -- and,
more than anything, I want HIM to survive."
"But I know almost nothing about what is going on in
Afghanistan right now," I shot back. "I haven't been
there since 2006, plus it's never a good idea to write
about stuff you know nothing about (even though Fox
News, Rush Limbaugh, Sarah Palin, the New York Times
and folks in the Senate appear to do it all the time).
You can lose credibility that way. But I do know a lot
of stuff about the TV show's 20th season, Heroes vs.
Villains." For instance I know that, even after ten
years on the show, Jeff Probst is still HOT.
And I also know that I just sent a video application
off to CBS so that I can be on their season 21 show --
and that if you watch my video, you will be voting for
me to win a free audition trip to L.A. Just click
here: http://www.cbs.com/primetime/survivor/casting_call/video_player.php?vid=4972&playvid=yes.
I'd be great on Survivor! Except of course for my
knees.
But Marine Mom wasn't going to let me off the hook
that easily and she e-mailed me again. "I have heard
from many Marines and others in the military that
having our troops on the ground and endangering them
is totally unnecessary. It's like Joe Biden said. We
can watch this all from the air." That's true. Hey,
even the Pentagon has access to Google Earth.
"Also, most of the enemy has gone to 'ungoverned'
areas of Pakistan. Since they are ungoverned, and
Admiral Mullen and others say that they are such a
risk to the USA, then we could bomb there, or use
hammer & anvil tactics and just tell Pakistan that
they should get on one side and we will be on the
other and the enemy in the 'ungoverned' area will get
crushed. These could be solutions to the problem. But,
basically, I believe that this war is non-winnable.
But if the goal is to give Afghans trust in their
government, that's totally impossible. We don't even
totally trust our own government!
"Also, there is a 'bait and switch' con-game going on
in Washington now," Marine Mom continued. "A former
Marine that I know told me that the Pentagon and
Washington never had any plans to totally leave Iraq
all along -- and that it is only an apparent switch to
Afghanistan. And it's not only just a switch to
Afghanistan, but a bait-and-switch too! We Americans
were sold the con that we were leaving the wars, but
after voting for 'change' away from war, we now find
out that it was all bait-and-switch all along! The
bait: Get out of wars. The switch: The Pentagon's
forces are still in Iraq, although claiming to leave,
and there's a massive build-up and huge bases being
built in Afghanistan too! And here our Marines go now,
off to Marjah."
And then a friend of mine in Kabul e-mailed me too.
"Kabul is calm after an explosion on the Jalalabad
road yesterday, east of Kabul; where many military
bases are located. The target was a military convoy
but civilians were again the victims. And yesterday
five suicide-bomber organizers were arrested by the
Afghan police in the eastern part of Kabul. The
organizers apparently got their training and equipment
from the other side of the AfPak border. They had
guns, bombs, special suicide jackets and other
explosive materials with them at the time of their
arrest."
So. Has hearsay made me an expert on Afghanistan yet?
Yeah.
And here's even more stuff from Marine Mom, regarding
gays in the military. "We don't need to be separating
the gays out NOW, right in the middle of a war. What
we really need to do is to separate the WINNERS and
the LOSERS -- both in the general and in officer
corps. If a heterosexual is a loser and has a culture
of losing, and the gay has a culture of VICTORY, they
need to pick the one with the CULTURE OF VICTORY. The
key is to WIN the wars they are sent to -- and, even
more important, have politicians in office who will
only send our troops to war IF IT IS NECESSARY."
Hmmm. That's all well and good. I like a victory as
much as the next guy. But what exactly does "victory"
in Afghanistan consist of? From where I sit, "victory"
seems to consist of winning as many big contracts and
as much resource booty as possible for globalized
corporatists with no loyalty to America and also for
weapons manufacturers. That seems to be the whole
rationale for our troops to be spending nine long
bloody years slogging around in Afghanistan. And it
seems to be the only rationale that I can see for the
war on Iraq and the nightmare in Palestine too.
There can't be any other reason. Nothing else is
logical. Nothing else makes sense.
If one were to actually approach world relations
logically, one would also discover that one catches
more flies with honey than with vinegar.
Take Norway for instance. Its government serves its
people. It doesn't have an oppressive ruling class.
Everyone likes Norway. The Norwegians use honey
instead of vinegar. For example, have you ever heard
of Norway being accused of torture?
Okay. Now that I (and Dick Cheney) have let the cat
out of the bag, let's talk about torture. Villains in
the employ of the supposedly freedom-loving, moral and
honorable U.S. are torturing Afghans, Iraqis and
Palestinians like crazy -- and these torturers are
torturing some pretty hard-core dudes. These dudes
that are now being tortured have already been abused
and tortured since their childhoods. They know how to
either resist torture or to make up fancy lies while
on The Rack. These dudes are USED to torture and
abuse.
But OMG! What if you treat these guys kindly? What if
you surprise them with the very first gentleness that
they may have ever experienced in their whole lives?
They'll crack!
Just let ME at these hard-core dudes. I'd do a
half-hour of Jin Shin Jyutsu acupressure moves on them
and soon have them crying like babies. "No one has
ever been NICE to me before!" they'd wail -- as they
spilled all the beans.
Of course no one has ever been nice to you, dummy.
Duh. If you are living on land that has water or oil
or whatever under it or you are standing in the way of
a freaking pipeline or are a pawn in the Great Game?
Or you are the only thing standing in the way of the
Western "capitalist" money-making juggernaut? What the
freak else did you expect?
Let's move on.
On the TV show "Survivor Samoa," Russell tried to
weaken and destabilize his opponents in order to win
the game. And that's just like what has happened in
"Survivor Afghanistan"!
Pakistan has spent the last 40-odd years trying to
destabilize Afghanistan.
Russia and the USSR have spent the last 40-odd years
trying to destabilize Afghanistan.
The powers-that-be in Washington DC, the CIA and the
Pentagon have spent the last 40-odd years trying to
destabilize Afghanistan.
And guess what? This strategy is working! Afghanistan
has been destabilized like crazy. Their socks are
toast!
Right now, Afghans themselves don't seem to have a
snowball's chance in Hell of winning "Survivor
Afghanistan". It's like on the first episode of the TV
show's Season 20 -- when one of the Villains shouted,
"Break her arm!" If the Pentagon does switch to
drone-only warfare in Afghanistan, Afghans are going
to immediately get voted off their own country. It's
like Jeff Probst says. "Fire represents life." And
after the "Tribe" gets done speaking in "Survivor
Afghanistan," chances are rather good that, if you are
an Afghan, your torch will be OUT. And you will be
dead.
PS: Here's the latest report on Survivor: Heroes vs.
Villains. Which players on the show used honey this
week? And which of them used vinegar? Let's find out.
James definitely used vinegar on this episode.
"Stephanie needs to be gone!" he cried. And she was.
But Cirie used honey -- and that worked too. My money
is on her. I bet that James is gonna be voted out as
soon as there's a merge. And I bet that Cirie will be
one of the finalists. Honey wins every time! That, and
a little bit of skulduggery.
©
EsinIslam.Com
Add Comments